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January 13, 2026
Celebrity

Ariana Grande Jokes She ‘Would Need an Extra Brain’ to Release New Music Anytime Soon

Ariana Grande Jokes She ‘Would Need an Extra Brain’ to Release New Music Anytime Soon…

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  • “I know exactly what he is capable of when he is deployed in his absolute best tactical role. He was completely wasted and misunderstood in England, but he will be the defining engine of our new midfield at the San Siro” – Ruben Amorim has officially green-lit a stunning £21.6 million transfer raid on his former club to rescue an elite Manchester United star. The newly appointed boss has instructed the board to wrap up the paperwork immediately for a spectacular reunion in Italy.
  • “The social media claims stating an official £100m bid was submitted are completely false. The club will not be held to ransom, which is why the board has already opened quiet talks for a phenomenal €40m alternative” — An absolute transfer bombshell has dropped tonight as sources at a major German publication officially shut down the internet-breaking rumors surrounding Yan Diomande’s move to Anfield, revealing an entirely new winger target.
  • “He can’t even get a regular start for Portugal on the international stage right now and you want to anchor our entire midfield rebuild around him? Abort that deal immediately. INEOS needs to open direct talks for this £80m tactical marvel instead—he is literally Mainoo 2.0” – Manchester United icon Paul Scholes has completely gone nuclear on the club’s primary transfer roadmap, demanding the hierarchy drop the Fernandes pursuit immediately for a superior elite powerhouse.
  • “He was vital in my success at Chelsea, and I want him to continue to help me at the Etihad” – Stamford Bridge has been plunged into absolute boardroom chaos tonight as former boss Enzo Maresca actively plots a ruthless £40m raid on his old squad after agreeing to succeed Pep Guardiola.
  • “He is an incredible talent, but he simply does not fit the structural profile required for our midfield system. He is no longer part of our immediate first-team plans” — Shockwaves are vibrating through the transfer market today as Florentino Perez confirms a dramatic U-turn regarding a world-class Argentina midfielder. Reports suggest that the sudden return of a legendary elite manager at the Bernabéu has completely shattered the club’s previous promises, leaving Chelsea’s hierarchy absolutely delighted.

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